Outfit # 71: Climbing fences

Outfit # 72
I don’t ever want to live after the glory days. I want every day to be the building of a crescendo, even if it’s only by small increments. But I’ll be honest, it’s hard to feel the upward slope sometimes. In political science we talked about how security of any type was an illusion and the wheel of fortuna spins and lands randomly for us all. But I imagine with a steady job and fair pay that truth is less apparent.

Every month I’m shocked when I’ve made it without hitting zero in my bank account. And I still feel spoiled. I am living the perfect storm. I have the time, the physical and mental ability to do what I want, and a place to eat and sleep free of charge. On top of that, I have a supportive family and friend group who cheer me on.

I never feel like I’m doing enough, succeeding enough to deserve this life of luxury. I often remind myself that few are given the opportunities I have been given. Don’t be fooled. I haven’t earned this.  I am living an artist’s residency full time, but I am not yet an artist. Who is given such opportunity that was not born in fortune? I am working my way to deserving. I am not there yet.
Outfit # 72 DSC_0063-2
My suede pale blue fringe vest with a white peasant blouse underneath tucked into DIY jean shorts makes me want to go to music festivals and skip through flower fields during golden hour.  Shout out to my Vans for existing and being mine. 
Outfit # 72

Comments

  1. This is really beautifully written! Your outfit makes me want to go to a music festival too!

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